My dad is naturally embarrassing. Sometimes he tries to embarrass me on purpose, but for the most part, it’s when he makes no effort at all that he is the most embarrassing.
I had to go to the doctors today… with my dad. So you can see where this is going. 
I don’t like going to the doctors. At my surgery there are two doctors, a man and a woman. The man has been our family doctor for fourteen years and is retiring. He’s the type of guy that lets you run riot in his room whilst he takes a blood sample from your parent; the type of guy who’d give you lollipops if he had any.
The other doctor is a woman who is stricter and whom I have only been to twice. She’s alright, really; just fell on hard times after her divorce. My dad insists her hairstyle is like a pineapple, so we always go into the surgery singing under our breaths, “she’s got a pineapple on her head” to the tune of ‘He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands’. xD
I had to see Pineapple Head today to ask about some lumps on my ear lobes. Last weekend I went to get my ears pierced, except they couldn’t pierce through the lumps as they didn’t know what they were. They tried piercing behind the lumps but on the first ear the gun got stuck and I ended up with a half-pierced lobe (at this point during the piercing I was in an incredibly cranky mood whilst glaring at the floor). They then suggested I get a note from the doctor detailing that they could pierce through the lumps. 
Upon arriving at the surgery, I realised the receptionist had the same glasses as me. My dad, typically, said that we both had the same glasses at which point the receptionist awkwardly mentioned they went with everything.
When we went to the waiting room, he talked loudly to some other blokes that were a bit older than him. I sat there quietly before I was called by Pinapple Head. My dad accompanied me, and began to talk to her about who the next doctor would be, laughing and slapping his knees.
Trust my dad. I love the guy but sometimes, I can do without his natural and easy embarrassment. 
I remember I was once shopping with him at Waitrose, a supermarket. I was standing in front of the olives because he wanted some though he had a tub at home. When I wouldn’t move he said to some random lady, “Excuse me, could you pick up some olives for me? My beautiful daughter is standing in front of them and won’t let me get any. Youths these days, eh?”
It should be known: your dad can embarrass you whether he tries or not. It’s a simple fact of life. 
- What’s your family doctor like?
- When and why did you last go to the doctor?
- On a scale of 1 to 10, how embarrassing is your dad?
Today’s Photo
My mum randomly got me this yesterday. It’s a stapler shaped as a bird.
